What is the worst name you’ve ever called yourself? Stupid? Or thick? Ugly or fat? Clumsy? We use words about ourselves that we wouldn’t dream of saying to a good friend. You might think being mean to yourself is motivational whereas in fact, research shows treating yourself as you would a good friend, i.e. with compassion, makes for better physical health and body image as well as helping you cope when life serves you lemons.

SELF COMPASSION IS NOT THE SAME AS SELF CARE

Self compassion is not the same as self care (that bubble bath at the end of the day), it’s how you talk to yourself in the difficult moments. Changing the voice in your head to a soft kind one works as it gets to the heart of how we are made. Our bodies are programmed to respond to warmth, gentle touch and soft vocalisation.

ASK YOURSELF HOW CAN I COMFORT AND CARE FOR MYSELF

Self-compassion involves acting the same way towards yourself when you are having a difficult time, fail, or notice something you don’t like about yourself. Instead of just ignoring your pain with a “stiff upper lip” mentality, you stop to tell yourself “this is really difficult right now,” how can I comfort and care for myself in this moment?

WHO EVER SAID YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE PERFECT?

Instead of mercilessly judging and criticizing yourself for various inadequacies or shortcomings, self-compassion means you are kind and understanding when confronted with personal failings – after all, who ever said you were supposed to be perfect?